I Need You Right Now.

Turns out, I made myself sicker by going out with Kevin. Man, I feel like the worst best friend ever. :[ I ended up not going to Cassie's last night, and I'm not hanging out with her today. I wish I could see her...I miss her so much. I just felt so bad last night; my stomach hurt and I couldn't breathe through my nose and I kept coughing and sneezing...good times. I asked her if I could just go over there last night, but not spend the night. It didn't work out, though.

But come to find out, a mixture of Nyquil and sinus medication is the perfect mixture! I was knocked out pretty fast, but then woke up in the middle of the night with a pain in my back and shoulders and couldn't go back to sleep. I wished so much that Kevin had a cell phone because I wanted to call him.

Today's a boring day, as every Sunday seems to be. I guess not so much boring as it is lazy. This morning, I ate my cereal and watched TV. I tape Fringe every week, but I've never seen an episode. So I watched the one from a few weeks ago, but I forgot one small, very important detail: American Idol had run over, so the whole show of Fringe wasn't taped. :[ I guess if worst comes to worst, I can watch it online.
Then I helped Mom and Dad pick weeds outside. We turned on the outside radio, and it made things seem to go a little faster. Around 11:00, we started to get hungry, so I went inside and made sandwiches. And so I guess since noon, I've been in my room, checking MySpace, talking to Kevin, and sorting through messages. I deleted all of the hundreds of pages that were full of messages from a "This profile no longer exists" ... which I can only guess were messages from Mandy all of those, well, months ago.
And it's making me think, also making me cry. Not full on breaking down and losing control. I just can't believe we're not friends anymore. I guess, to me, it would be like if Kevin and I broke up. It would just be...weird, and it would take forever for me to get back on my feet. She was as important to me as Kevin is now. It's just so ... weird that we're not friends. And I know it's been months (and months and months) that we haven't been friends. And longer still that we haven't seen each other. But I can't help but miss her sometimes.

Anyway, I still don't feel good, and I think I still have some Nyquil in my system. So I'm going to go take a nap.

-Lindsay